Monday, June 28, 2010

Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His Glory and Grace...
                                              Helen H. Lemmel

Oh, how messy life can be!  You might feel as though you've got it all pretty squared away and the things of life are moving along in the right direction... and WHAM!  Someone, or something, puts a kink in your air hose and you find yourself fighting to reach the surface of sanity and for a breath of relief.  All of a sudden, you are struggling to keep your head above the waters of despair, grief, anger, fear, or all of the above.  We fight against the feelings of being overwhelmed, or at other times, we are paralyzed by worry and anxiety over tragedy and other things out of our control.  After exhausting and draining every bit of our waning energy, we fall into bed at night unable to sleep and recharge as we rehearse our next move, think through the worst case scenarios, or spend worry on the endless possibilities.

WHY?  Why do we even attempt to battle, defend, work, run and manipulate when the Word of God clearly tells us to rest...  Rest in Him.  Sisters, when we carry on out of our own strength and determination in the throws of trouble, we are disobeying direct orders from our Commander in Chief and we sin.  Why do we press on in pride trying to handle things on our own?  It makes no sense, yet I have struggled with this time and again.  We tell the Almighty God of the universe, Creator of heaven and earth, that we are grateful that He sent His Son to die for us and raised Him from the dead.  However, our actions are in contrast saying, "I don't trust You to take care of me or my problems.  I got this one, I'll handle it."  I might as well say to the Father, "I can throw my hands up in worship before a congregation of people, I will tell of Your wonders and grace, but I will not trust You to save me, carry me or heal me."  Sisters, if this is all there is to Christianity and we are left alone to fend for ourselves, then why make Jesus our Lord and SAVIOR in the first place?

The beauty and blessing of being a child of the Most High God, is that He promises to love us, protect us, and use ALL things, even the greatest tragedy, for our good!  He can redeem it all!  All we must do is learn to rest and trust in Him.  (Psalm 37:7)  This may be difficult in the beginning, not because He makes it so, but because our flesh does.  Although, if we continually call on Him for His peace that passes all understanding, and if we take every thought captive and hold them up to the light of His Word and Truth; He will train our hearts and minds to die unto our flesh and rest in His strong, capable, and loving arms. 

It is in these times that our wonderful God draws us near if we will stop for a moment, ignore the whirling winds around us and listen to His calling...  Calling to be still, stand and watch as He takes what we have, even the worst we can imagine, and see Him create beauty from ashes.  (Ephesians 6:13, Isaiah 61:3)  He will draw back the choking waters about our heads and turn it into wine that is sweet to our lips.  He will strengthen our weary backs burdened with the things of life and uphold us with His mighty right hand. (Isaiah 41:10)

Oh, believe me, I can complain with the best of them in the midst of such worrisome and grievous days!  Although, when I stop and press into Him instead, I find that these are some of the greatest moments with my Father.  I now look forward to those times, ones so personally miraculous that they are indelibly written on my mind and spirit and can be recalled when other dark days come.  Not to say that I want to invite trouble, but there is nothing like the moment when I finally decide to hold out my hands and give up my pathetic attempts to control my situation and life... and He lifts the burden from me, and I can almost tangibly feel the weight depart as His gentle love surrounds me.  It is then that my light and momentary troubles seem to wash away.  I can breath again and that deep indwelling joy begins to bubble back up to the surface and overflow, in the knowing that all of these things will be used for an eternal glory that will outweigh them all!  (2 Corinthians 4:16-18)  I love that place.  That place in Him, where my spirit can find rest.

Will you hold out your troubles to Him today, and trust Him to complete the good work He started in your life?  (Philippians 1:6)  Will you allow Him to be more than just a passing thought or prayer at the dinner table, and allow Him to be your Savior?  Your Friend?  Your Protector?  Your Provider?  Your Rock?  He is waiting for you, dear Sister, and He is able!

2 Corinthians 4:16-18  Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 

Ephesians 3: 17-19  Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.  (New Living Translation)

Psalm 27:1  The LORD is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear?  The LORD is the stronghold of my life— of whom shall I be afraid?

Isaiah 41:10  So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Bible references from the New International Version, unless otherwise noted.


Friday, June 18, 2010

Daughters, Dads, and the One True Father

I was with my Bible study girls yesterday.  We are on our usual summer hiatus because of all the activities of summer, but there are a few of us who want and need the fellowship and accountability.  Without even realizing the timing of our conversation with Father's day fast approaching, the girls set out to comfort one of our own whose earthly father has been less than perfect.  Years of grief over his abuse, lack of understanding and selfish ways had taken their toll.  Her heart for this man, that she hoped would love her, was broken.

This precious group of women shared one by one the deep wounds their hearts had also suffered as children and adults.  One friend told about the hurt of never knowing her biological father.  She was the product of her mother's adulterous relationship, who along with her husband, decided to raise her.  Who knows if it was his resentment of the relationship that produced this dear Sister, or if he was simply a sick man; but the father she knew repeatedly abused her for his own selfish gratification.

Another woman shared how she and her mother were abandoned by her father and she never knew him, always wondering if he loved her or if he even cared that she was alive.  She wrote him letter after letter growing up, never once receiving any response.  Her childhood followed a mother through various relationships and no real decent man to call on as "daddy."

Even another Sister expressed how she lived the presumed "perfect family life" with a mother and father committed to one another.  Yet her father was a perfectionist and she never felt as though she could measure up and meet his expectations.  She lived through her childhood feeling like an unaccepted failure.

The young woman, who was so hurt by her disappointment in her dad, listened intently to the devastating stories.  You might think that the grief piled up as these women shared, but actually, it was quite the opposite.  What came through each story loud and clear was the nearness of Christ as He met them in their hurt and longing to be loved.  Every daughter has a deep desire (one of these Sister's even described it as desperation) to be loved and valued by a father.  What was learned through the pain of unfilled voids that sought a daddy's adoration was that their true Father in heaven loved them completely and would heal all their wounds.

These women found that they had to stop counting on mere humans for fulfillment, completion, happiness, love, approval, acceptance, security and so much more.  Instead, they now choose to place their full trust and hearts in the hands of Jesus, and they are finally free.  Liberty came at the realization that these dads, as well as everyone else in their lives, would surely disappoint simply because of their human frailty.  Now they are free to accept these men for who they are and what they lacked.  They can love them with the same love that Christ first showed them, with hearts full of grace and forgiveness, no longer burdened with bitterness and hurt.  Moreover, they shared the victory in following the Lord and marrying the men of His choosing, men that are all they could hope for as fathers to their children.

I won't suggest that all the pain is gone all the time, they never suggested that.  However, when the little things come that remind them of past injuries, and the sting begins to well up, they turn to their true Father who will never leave them or forsake them. (Hebrews 13:5)  They climb into the lap of His love and feel His arms of strength, security and protection wrap around them.  They are able to rest in the knowing that He alone is their identity, hope, and eternity.  NOTHING can separate them from His love. (Romans 8:38-39, Hebrews 4:16)

I have had my feelings crushed by people in the past, mostly due to poor decisions on my part.  However, my dad was a blessing to me growing up.  I remember him as a leader, a firm disciplinarian with a gentle hand and always a hug, having a genuine interest in everything I did or said...  Allowing me to feel secure in knowing I could always approach him and be lovingly received.  His example is a wonderful reflection of our Father in heaven.  As I listened to these women I was again reminded of the blessing and gift of my dad, but also, how faithful our Father God is to use all things for good.  God redeemed, for His glory, the deficits in the lives of these women. (Romans 8:28)

Though I might have initially considered these accounts as loss in their lives, nothing could be further from the truth!  Surely it would be loss without faith in Christ, but with Him, even these tragedies worked to build strength, character, and greater faith and hope.  These women have such a sweet and deep reliance and trust in their Lord.  There is a peace of heart grounded in the promise of His approval, acceptance and devotion to them.  They are filled to overflowing with the joy of being a daughter truly loved and valued.  This assurance and confidence in their Father and God is something that many believers seek to know.  So, any loss has become their gain in Christ!  I am so thankful for these sisters, their testimonies, and their willingness to share with us how God has revealed to them who their true Father is.  For them, He is all that matters.  With this in mind, we can all give thanks this Father's Day for a Daddy's love that will never fail.

2 Corinthians 6:18  "I will be a Father to you, and you will be My sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."

John 1:12-13  Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in His Name, He gave the right to become children of God— children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God.

Psalm 68:5  A Father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling.

Hebrews 13:5b  In a variety of translations to emphasize how much He cares for you!
...God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." (New International Version)
...God has said, "I will never fail you. I will never abandon you." (New Living Translation)
...He has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”  (English Standard Version)
...He Himself has said, "I WILL NEVER DESERT YOU, NOR WILL I EVER FORSAKE YOU."  (New American Standard Bible)
...God has said, "I will never leave you or abandon you."  (International Standard Version)
...God has said, "I will never abandon you or leave you."  (God's Word Translation)

Bible references taken from the New International Version unless otherwise noted.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Who Is the Beholder of Your Beauty?

  "Mama?"  My five year old daughter asked quietly.
  "Yeah?"  I answered.
  "Julie says that her Mama told her that she is the most beautiful girl in the whole world."
  "Huh?" I asked, giving her my full attention.
  "She said that if her Mama said it, then it's true."  She looked at me with questioning eyes.
  "Hmmmm."  My mind whirling as it donned on me how destructive these simple little "loving" comments could really be.
  "Is it true Mama?  Is she the most beautiful girl in the whole world?  Her Mama tells her that every night before she goes to bed."  She searched my face for a response and reassurance.
  I took my daughter's hand, sat her down with me and looked her straight in the eye.  "Yes."  I said, seeing the surprise of disappointment on the most beautiful face I have ever seen.  "She is the most beautiful girl in the world, to her Mama.  Sometimes, Mama's can only see beauty in their own children.  Her Mama wasn't lying to Julie; she probably believes what she says.  But, what she said isn't true to everyone.  Do you understand?"
  "No."  She said with tears starting to well in her eyes.
  I realized in that moment that my daughter wanted me to tell her that she was the most beautiful girl in the whole world.  I wanted to cave and tell her what she wanted to hear.  Then, I realized that I had allowed the values of the world to begin to shape my daughter's perspective of what was important about her.  I had not intervened and directed her to who Christ says that she is.  I had even contributed to the frailty of her developing self value by putting emphasis more on her outward appearance than on her heart and relationship with Jesus.  That was the changing moment, and I asked God to help me to know what to say next.  I didn't want to hurt her, but I had to disappoint her with truth in love, so that she would not be devastated later by the lie she had been learning.  The lie that so many of us get sucked into, and waste time, money and energy on instead of things of true value.  In retrospect, maybe I could have been more gentle.  Although, in the moment, I didn't have the benefit of hindsight.  In fact, I was quite disturbed by the worldly education of superficial values she was already being indoctrinated with.  So I continued on.
  "You are a beautiful girl.  God made you.  He created every detail of you, and there is no one like you.  But...  there will always be someone prettier, smarter, or more creative than you are, or I am."  She was really upset now. "They are prettier, smarter and more creative because that is what the world says they are.  The 'world' is what people think and believe.  But those things are NOT what God says is important.  It isn't fair for Julie's Mama to tell her those things."
  "Why?" She cut in.
  "She means it to be nice, but really, Julie is only going to be sad when she realizes that not everyone thinks that she is the prettiest girl in the whole world."  She looked at me intently.  "It would be better if Julie's Mama told her how she is beautiful to God."  As I was talking, I realized I had been doing just as poorly in this area of parenting as Julie's mother.  "What really matters is who God says we are, and what HE says is beautiful about us."
  "What does He say?"  She asked.
  "God says that what is beautiful about us is our hearts - the inside person; how we love Him and want to know Him; how we love others and serve others for Him.  These are the things that are really beautiful and the Bible teaches us how to have this kind of beauty.  We are supposed to take care of our bodies because God gave them to us and they are His temple, but they are not what is most important about us.  What is truly beautiful about you is that you love Jesus and you want to know Him more.  You are His child, His treasure; He loves you and wants you with Him.  You are His beautiful creation, He knows everything about you and will ALWAYS love you."
  Relief and joy flooded her face.  She hugged me like I had told her the best news in the entire world, and really, I finally had.  His truth set her free.  Free to seek the Lord's approval instead of people's approval.
  Surely, the female mind and heart love to hear that she is beautiful.  Being "pretty" in a princess dress to "lovely" in a wedding gown are addresses to our femininity, and they bless us.  The trick is, to teach our children not to desire this approval above all else.  It would be better to raise a daughter who appreciates a complement, but wholly desires to know who she is in Christ.  Of course we want her husband to appreciate her beauty.  However, it is far more important that she is drawn to a man who thinks her walk with Christ is her most beautiful quality.
  Maybe you believed the lies about what the world told you is beautiful.  Maybe you have unwittingly taught your children these things as well.  It can be hard to avoid in this superficial world we live in.  Don't despair; simply turn to your Father in heaven!  He wants to show you just how precious and beautiful you are to Him.  He will forgive your missteps and give your heart and mind a new perspective, if you ask Him.  He will grow in you a beauty that will not fade.
  After that conversation, my daughter loved to say,  "I am God's beautiful creation!"...  She is, and so are you!

Proverbs 31:30  Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

1 Peter 3:3-4  Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.  Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.

2 Corinthians 4:16  Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.

Bible references taken from the New International Version

My 95 year old Grandpa sends me pictures to remind me of home :) I love his perspective and thoughtfulness.